Hypocritically Free Country

Several things caught my attention that afternoon. Someone I really admire told me that the works exposed in that museum were from very creative and distinguished writers, so I started having a keened attention for every piece of work. A work with a “CENSURED” label attracted me immediately it was titled: “Tropic of Cancer, Unexpurgated Edition”. This book was prohibited in the United States before 1964 by the Massachusetts Obscene Literature Control Commission (MOLCC). This book was strongly criticized by most people because of its “obscene” language because it contained explicit words referred to sexuality.

[By the way –words- just symbols… some specific combinations of symbols, placed together, so powerful as to create all kinds of connections in the brains of those who can understand its language, and then create infinite images in our minds and emotions in our bodies.]

Many critics said that it would represent the perdition of youth and future generations, a social and moral disaster…

Later I read the authors response to the critics –an article republished by Playboy (1962). Henry Miller, the author of this book who fought for 30 years for the freedom of speech against the MOLCC, ends the article saying “Show me your clean hands, your clean heart, your clean conscience, I defy you!”

After spending a considerable amount of time hearing an interview in which this books and similar kinds of readings were criticized, after reading the above response from Miller, and after copying some details to search more on it later, I walked to another area of the museum in which I saw a huge image of the cover of Tropic of Cancer, next to it there was a small area dedicated to the Book Burning. Some ipods were standing there, tempting me to listen at them, and so I did. It was a story that the radio in the U.S. transmitted about the Nazi Book Burning. They were reproducing that terrible scene as if it were happening in the U.S. The narration was marvelous, using just the right amount of comical narrations without losing a spot of the tremendously pernicious situation, a master work.

I could feel –again thanks to the combination of symbols, translated in sounds, and my understanding of the language- the terrifying sensation of the symbolism of this tragic scene. In my mind I could see that moment, as a castrated witness. I could feel the horror… The horror of the intention of those human beings to murder history, intellectuality, knowledge, freedom… especially freedom, of the speech, of the action.. of the mind… a murder of wisdom. “Lincoln, to the fire; Einstein, to the fire” The intention of the Nazi was to kill every molecule of liberty, freedom and courage that could bring to life any human intention to develop such marvelous and wise concepts.

The narration was based on a book called “They Burned the Books” by Stephen Vincent Benét.

Now, why did I talk this much about such different readings?

Well.. the Books Burning  happened in 1933…  They Burned the Books was published and transmitted in 1942… Tropic of Cancer was PROHIBITED in the United States of America until 1964.. that’s 31 years after the Book Burning and tree decades after the American critic transmission of They Burned the Books

I will let you conclude my thoughts by asking you to relate the function of the U.S.’s MOLCC with that of the Nazi.

Call it prohibition, call it a burning.. both are different ways –words- referred to the murdering of freedom.

Brute force, no matter how strongly applied, can never subdue the basic human desire for freedom.

-- Dalai Lama

Love and Gender

In Gendered close relationships, Wood explains that since little have changed since old times in regards of the way different genders experience and interpret what closeness is. Wood explains that these differences are socially constructed and reinforced over the time by the society, as men are expected to accomplish some goals that differ greatly from those expected from women. In this sense, men are expected to be “the head of the family” meaning that it is his responsibility to provide monetary resources and be the most powerful figure in the family dynamics while women are expected to take care of the house, children, and even the romantic relationship with their partners. Even in most open-minded relationships, many researches had found that this distribution of roles is almost impossible to avoid despite many attempts from both partners to break this strong family structure. 

One of the main ideas exposed in this Wood’s text is that women experience and develop closeness mainly through communication involving very intimate subjects. In this sense, a woman creates significant ties when she shares and receives intimate information like feelings, likes and dislikes, personal views and situations, etc. In contrast, men’s experience of closeness is related to sharing activities and intimate conversations are no more than a nuisance most times. These great differences between genders in the main reason that leads a couple to have misunderstandings that often leads to fights, ruptures, and broken hearts. This very different ways of finding deep and intimate connection to each other is a reflection of the very different meaning that a relationship has for each woman and man: while men tend to seek a relationship to accomplish goals, and solve problems, women tend to seek relationships to create intimacy and share personal feelings and experiences.

The differences in same sex and heterosexual romantic relationships are exposed in the following chapter.

Heterosexual love relationships	Lesbian romantic relationships	Gay romantic relationships
·         Difficulties in understanding each other’s interpretation of closeness and intimacy: men by sharing activities, women by communicating feelings ·         Men avoiding emotions and intimate problems by concentrating in work; women wanting to talk problems through in long conversations right away. ·         Relationships often lead to a feeling of being misunderstood and lack of accompaniment. ·         Men usually spend more time in work and women often do much more work at home –regardless of any professional work- ending up feeling exhausted, hurt, and stressed.	·         The difficulties of differences are eliminated; both women have the same need of talking though problems and create intimacy by sharing emotions, feelings, thoughts, etc. ·         Home duties are shared. ·         There are no conflicts in regards of power. ·         Lesbian relationships tend to be felt as comfortable, intimate, supportive and happy	·         Intimacy is carried out by sharing activities; intimate communication of feeling is not common. ·         There are high difficulties in managing power as both partners tend to compete for it. (salaries, opinions, decisions, etc.) ·         Gay romantic relationships are often perceived as unpleasant. ·         There is much more tolerance to sex relationships outside the couple.

When it hurts..

Sometimes it is very easy to drown on the deep sorrow that loneliness offers us when we just go through a rupture that scratches the soul. However, with the time and a pair of scars from previous losses, one learns that even though it hurts for real and deeply, the objective is to be aware of ones feelings and thoughts and about whatever lesson this relationship has to leave us.

So I'll keep repeating to myself: you know this is only temporal, only an acute pain, not a chronic one, it'll pass and you'll be better. Think about what you can learn from all this and be grateful for the opportunity of have loved and have been loved. Remember: you are never alone, loneliness is no more than a macabre trick of a mind used to sadness.

Just thinking..

Today dear a classmate shared a comment from Oscar Wilde with me from which I quote:

"all romance is based on deception"

I immediately thought that this comment could have been shared by Freud too.. you know, in the insatiable search  of our most beautiful human characteristics, typically in the darkest places. -Don't get me wrong, I still admire and respect Freud, I still think he was a tremendous genius for his time- but is it that frightening for humans to discover that love and relationships are a beautiful, enlightened part of our selves instead of blaming the "omnipotent" dark side of our nature? Would it be because we are afraid of being responsible for our mistakes and obscure relationships? Or is it the immense vulnerability and power that it implies? Is that too much for us to handle still?

My thoughts:

Yes, definetly, those relationships that are painful and dry our soul by so much crying.. yes, they come from deception, or.. well I'll change that and say "lack" or "need".


oops, class is over, to be continued..

Moderns Romantic Love vs. Spiritual love

In the current times, romantic love is commonly viewed as a relationship between two individuals that are expected to act in some specific ways to each other. Some of those “duties” include –but are not limited to- faithfulness, understanding, support, intimacy, and respect. The perceptions of the expected behaviors in a modern romantic love relationship can, and do change between cultures. However, it can be seen that in most of the western societies, the lack of any of the above expectations can create unpleasant situations to both of the partners, destroy relationships, and even worst, subsume a couple in a complicated, destructive, codependent, and painful relationship.

In the other hand, spiritual/love relationships are those in which nothing is taken for granted. A great value and respect is given to other individuals and to existence from a very deep understanding, wise and humble spiritual level. As spiritual love embraces everything in love, it expects nothing and cannot be destroyed by anything, going beyond the material world. This difference in regards of the expectancy is one of the greatest differences between modern romantic love relationships and spiritual love/relationships, making the former a much more fragile way of being related to one another.

However, there is a convergent point for these two types of relationships: sometimes it is common to see that for a human being it is necessary to go through different unsuccessful modern romantic love relationships in order to reach the necessary wisdom, humbleness, and self-development point to be able to experience spiritual love. This situation is perfectly described by F. Dostoevsky in The Dream of a Ridiculous Man, when it was only after the main character reached the lowest point of suffering and deception, that he could understand the true nature of the human being, and that is, the true nature of the spirit whose ultimate purpose is spiritual and enlightened love. 

Reference 2

                                                                                                            Laugh


                       Gorman, J. (2011, September 13). Scientists hint at why laughter feels so good.
                          The New York Times, p. A14. Retrieved from http://www.nytimes.com/


 Dr. Robin Dunbar at Oxford, demonstrated that laughter produces enough endorphin to increase 
pain resistance, which is a direct outcome of the nervous system; laughter is also a very common
                                    reaction when being either in love or in enlightened love.
     
    In addition, Dr. Provine showed that relaxed contagious social laughter is not only a very strong
   way of creating bonding between humans, but also among primates. Which demonstrates that 
     positive relationships-which usually involve love in its many ways- are an important source for 
humans to subsist as social beings, and through relationships an individual can evolve spiritually.

                                                                                                            Relate

Reference 1

Smart, L., Kubzansky, L., Maselko, J., Kawachi, I., Choo, P., & Bauer, M.
     (2005). Positive Emotion and Health: Going Beyond the Negative. Health 
     Psuchology, 24(4), 422-429. doi:10.1037/0278-6133.24.4.422
       

       This article is describe a correlational study between positive
       emotions, specifically curiosity and hope, with the changes in the immune
       system consering about three disease outcome.
  
       Statistics from the research showed that:
       1. No differences were found between ages.
       2. Higher levels of curiosity were more common in males.
       3. The socioeconomic status was related in an increasing bilateral
       way with the presence of both curiosity and hope emotions.
  
       The authors concluded that both curiosity and hope influence in
       a healthy way the main physiological systems and could work like a
       preventive factor for disease development.
  
       This article is useful because they made a study that relates
       some emotions to the immunology system and is an adequate resource to
       sustent my research.

Hope